Hallow’s Eve – and handling situations inutitively

Well a little excuse for this total gem – which is on Show of Hands new album and featured terrifically in live concert I recently saw them at in Canterbury.

Halloween came and went with little interest in the Furtheron household, my daughter and boyfriend spent an evening carving pumpkins in the week before but they were covered in mould (the pumpkins not my daughter and her boyfriend!) by the actual day and Mrs F soon consigned them to the compost bin!  No Trick or Treater’s called.  We have few families with young kids in our road so not surprising.  The bag of goodies Mrs F had bought was being devoured by everyone the day afterwards.

I watched the rugby world cup final.  At home where I was undisturbed; not in a noisy crowded bar jostling for a viewing position and distracted by getting the next beer in.  I was somehow reminded of those kind of days when it was on.  I’ve really enjoyed the rugby fest that the world cup has been.  Almost immediately a replacement hove to as the 3 match test series in the other code of Rugby League kicked off in Hull with England deservedly beating New Zealand.  Pity that wasn’t at Twickenham the day before in the 15 a side variety of the sport.  So two more matches in that one to look forward to and then the 6 nations after Christmas.

Son-of-Furtheron was briefly home for a truly flying visit on his way back from a week working at some exclusive institute in Switzerland.  Mrs F and I went to Heathrow to collect him Friday evening and he was gone again Saturday afternoon wanting to get back to his girlfriend, it was brief but nice to have him home.

My guitar playing has been piqued again by the latest project – if you scan right and are a regular reader you’ll see a new picture leading to my more music orientated blog.  I’ve just completed a project of rebuilding a cheap guitar in a manner I wanted to.  It’s a roaring success and the music mojo which has been lacking a bit lately has been reignited.

Tonight I’ll be attending one of my regular meetings.  It was the meeting that was my true home group for the first 9 years of recovery.  My course over the last two years took me away from it.  I initially mourned it’s loss then found a new group I could attend regularly that welcomed me in and which I enjoy attending.  The course is different time in the week this year so I have returned to this group.  At first I struggled – it had moved on that group I felt less at home there, but I’ve continued to be an “irregular” attender.  Last week was its last meeting in the venue it has been in for the last 28 years since its founding.  The church who owns the building and clearly is struggling to maintain it – (heaters not working, huge leaks in the roofs etc.) gave notice that they were to close the building in a year or so.  The group found a new venue around the corner which seemed pricey but they have been very accommodating to a self-supporting charity I have to say and we will hold our first meeting there tonight.  Another chapter in my recovery closed and another opened.  It’ll feel different but the same no doubt.

There is a line in a passage from the AA big book regularly called “the promises” which says “we will intuitively handle situations which used to baffle us”.  Now the ramble above of my small and meaningless life’s activities will seem mundane to most who’ll read it – they are but… I handle them.  These were the things, the little things in life that did regularly used to baffle me totally and I’d either hang on desperately to someone else who seemed to know what was going on and follow, or more accurately mimic, them blindly in the belief that what they were doing must be the “right” answer or I’d just screw it all up and go get drunk to blatt my head to bits so I didn’t have to worry and of course not feel insecure, emotional or inadequate.

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About furtheron

Music and guitar obsessive who is a recovering alcoholic to boot
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8 Responses to Hallow’s Eve – and handling situations inutitively

  1. Elsie Amata says:

    Glad you got to see your son, even if it was just a short visit. It’s tough having them gone and far away from home. Halloween is usually a bigger deal for us too but this year it fell flat for several reasons. One of which was a migraine – blasted things. But that’s okay. Peanut and I went to an amusement park the weekend before and celebrated there.

    I handle them.

    Well stated. So simple yet so powerful. I almost didn’t handle my own the last couple of weeks. Funny what will drive us to the edge, can be so small yet seem so big while we’re in it. I can happily say I maintained but it was the closest (and scariest) I’ve been in over twenty years. Humbling for sure.

    Thanks for sharing this post. Good read.

    • furtheron says:

      Glad you are well and commenting here Elsie – stay safe that is the most important motto I’ve even been given in the years I’ve been in recovery.

      • Elsie Amata says:

        Staying safe is the most important…and sane. That helps too. *smiles*

        Yeah, had to get back on the commenting side of things. Things got a bit wonky the last few weeks but they are for sure looking brighter!

  2. If American audiences ever catch on to rugby, American football is screwed, because rugby is a vastly superior game.

    I taught myself “Can’t Explain” over the weekend. Super-easy cords. Super-satisfying to play. I leave the lead to Pete, though.

    Can you even go into a bar anymore? How can you stand it?

    • furtheron says:

      That question probably deserves a post… or several!

      Simply put – if I have a good reason to go then there is no problem. For example Mrs F wanted to “pop out for lunch” on Saturday with Son-of-Furtheron. So we went to a local pub/restaurant. I’m there to have lunch – not a bad rump steak actually – with my wife and son and catch up on what he’d been up to in Switzerland, Christmas potential plans, college gossip from both our institutions – inc me reminding him to complete his ResearchFish return. So that is no problem – as long as I know why I’m there it is fine. I rarely go there if someone invited me “just for a drink”. I will ponder and write a post as it is an area that remains fluid for me at times… and has to.

  3. Untipsyteacher says:

    Dear Furtheron,
    SO true!!
    Thank you for reminding me!!
    What used to baffle me, I AM handling. Maybe not perfect but ever so much better!!
    When I was drinking, everything was a crisis.
    Now, life is so much calmer. At first I thought it was boring, but now I like the calmness.
    xo
    Wendy

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