I listened to a terrific story last night in my home group meeting. The speaker is a lady who from teenage years through her 20s and 30s was an alcoholic and addict, it nearly cost her her children and her life. I was struck as she talked about how my view of life, me, my place in the universe and everything else has changed in my recovery.
When I was drinking I sought something external to me, drink primarily but other things to to fulfil me. Make me fill better about myself and my place in the world. It never worked, my last binge was on a success where my wife text to say we could celebrate. My head just went “My life is still shit!” and I hit the booze.
Now though I realise that nothing external can ever make me feel whole that wholeness has to come from within and within is something in me that desires life and being better. I attach to it and follow the path it points out, better some days than others but it is there. Having looked inside and seen that when I now look out to the rest of the world I can cope a bit better with it, try to do my little bit at making some of it better for those near me and at least doing my utmost to ensure I do no damage to others as I walk my path.
I’ve completely turned my view and perspective through 180° … see… Inside Out… I was so lucky to go to the meeting and hear this inspirational lady. She didn’t set out to inspire me but her story and this thought is truly inspiration for me. I’ve had a bit more sparkly outlook on life today since thinking this.