Remember I was talking about my momentary flunk a month or so back and then suddenly being asked to speak at a couple of meetings… guess what … yes… I was asked to speak at another one this week.
It is odd how these things work. I have to say it was a hell of a rambling talk, I started off talking about this week for me and stuff, then about my drinking going to rehab, being taken to my first meeting… etc. It had little structure and as like I say more a stream of consciousness than anything. But, people listened and they shared back, there were tears, a confession I wasn’t expecting…. just typical stuff really.
The confession is the third one I’ve heard in as many weeks of people who’ve slipped on their path of recovery. It happens, but all three are people I wouldn’t have expected I thought they were going well, safe, secure. None of us are, these confessions are a stark reminder to me no-one is bullet proof in their recovery.
I’m so grateful these men came back and told me about it. I hope for my sake that I learn from them and don’t make the same mistakes. I hope for their sakes these were minor bumps and that they get back on board the boat and stay there.
For all of them it wasn’t a big thing, no one died, they didn’t get kicked out of home or lose a job or anything. They just thought – f*** it I could do with a drink to make me feel better. And so they took one, and another, and another… and guess what soon they felt worse not better. It is a story we all have heard, and many have experienced before starting recovery and some in their on going trudge on it’s path.